I have always worn nail polish.

I mean, at least for as long as I can remember. Throughout grade school, college, and beyond, I painted my nails on a weekly basis. It was kind of like therapy for me. I'd put a TV show on, and slowly perform my weekly nail polish ritual.

These days, I get shellac manicures—or shellac polish changes because they're cheaper!—once every couple of weeks. Chipped nail polish stresses me out, and I'd just rather not deal with it. It's definitely a luxury and something I could certainly cut out when I have a savings goal, but for now, it's just one of the things that I'm okay with spending "fun" money on. That, and barre classes. So since I switch my color out every two weeks, I try to opt for a neutral nail polish shade that goes with all the things.

In my opinion, these are the best neutral nail polish colors that match everything!

Black

I consider black nail polish to be neutral because it goes with everything I wear (which is mostly black). This may include true jet black or a range of "almost black" nail polish shades. Bona fide nail polish geeks know that the holy grail of "almost black" polish is Lincoln Park After Dark by OPI. It's a super deep purple that appears black to the untrained eye and I'm pretty sure it was created by actual witches. Plus, it has a fun name!

Nude

Nude nail polish is an obvious neutral choice. It looks classy, it makes your fingers look long and elegant, and it's the official nail polish color choice of the Dutchesses Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle. My thing with nude nail polish is that it needs to lean more towards a pinky-nude than a yellow-nude. This is because yellow-nude shades make me look like I have a weird skin condition like jaundice or something. However, there's still quite a spectrum of nude nail polish shades I wear. This could include a light brown shade, a beige color, a nice taupe, or a true nude-nude. Essie makes one of the best nude nail polishes in the shade Topless & Barefoot.

Red

You may not think red is neutral, but it is. Red nail polish is classic and it goes with everything. I am partial to an orangey-red shade but appreciate true red as well. Also, red is a lip color I often go for, so with an all-black outfit and some gold jewelry, red nails and lips are just the pop of color I need. Red nail polish is excellent for the holidays, but it can obv be worn year-round. Orange Punch by Orly is one of the best orangey-red nail polish shades out there.

Light Pink

Are you familiar with millennial pink? It's the shade (or range of shades) that my generation simply cannot get over. We like our shoes, headphones, ice-cream, hair, and iPhones to be light pink, and you better believe we want our nails to be this color too. As with the other best neutral nail polish colors on this list, light pink can range from pinky-nude to baby pink to light pinkish-violet. Ultra-violet is the 2018 Pantone Color of the Year, by the way, and sometimes I like when my nail polish nods to that. For light pink nail polish, I am into Innocence by China Glaze and Pretty Pink Preserves by OPI.

Deep Green

You're probably like, "What the F are you talking about?! Green is not neutral." Well, it actually is, in my opinion. I read that Sarah J essica Parker doesn't really ever paint her nails, but when she does for an awards show or something, she goes for a deep green. Dark green nail polish is subtle, sophisticated, and deliciously 90s. Sally Hansen's Cool Cucumber is an excellent forest green nail polish shade that's neutral AF.

So there you have it. Those are the best neutral nail polish colors that go with everything. And here you thought neutral nail polish only came in shades of nude!

Other neutral nail polish colors I sometimes go for are gray, maroon, and light blue. Gray and maroon nail polish are great shades for Fall. Light blue is fun for Spring, but the perfect baby blue nail polish can be tough to find. For me, it often ends up looking like Facebook blue. I also like dark brown nail polish colors which totally go with black clothing, in my opinion, because brown is a natural color and my fingers are connected to my body. Kinda like how I can have brown hair and wear black? And sometimes I'll go with a neon color for my toes, which is weirdly versatile.

For the past few years, I've been filing my nails round and keeping them long-ish. I think this looks better, but who knows? Maybe I'll go back to square nails someday. Having painted nails makes me feel professional and I think it makes me type faster, which I realize is strange. Painted nails are just part of my uniform. It's my thing.

One of my dream jobs is to come up with names for nail polish colors. It's all puns! What are your go-to nail polish colors? I seriously wanna know.